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31 Days, Articles, Christian Living, Devotionals, Disability

Day 7 – Remember Calvary

Happy Wednesday, friends. Thanks for staying with me on this 31 Day writing journey. Over the past few days I have had some sleepless nights, but each day God is showing me His grace in new ways.

One of my favorite missionaries is Amy Carmichael. Amy was a missionary in India for many years, but later in life dealt with physical illnesses and suffering that left her homebound. During that time she wrote about things that the Lord was teaching her. Last night I read this quote from her that helped put things in perspective for me. She states,

”Above all there is this, look at Calvary. Look steadfastly. Take time to look and all within you will be hushed. For power streams forth from Calvary. We never need to know defeat.”

Wow! When I read that it reminded me of what Jesus did for me on the cross and that I am not alone in my suffering. There is nothing that I am experiencing that Jesus can’t relate to, and He is always by my side offering His comfort and strength. I do not know what you are facing today but whether it is good or bad take time to dwell on Calvary and take comfort in the healing presence of Jesus. As Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble, but take heart I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33). Praise God for that, and for the gift of Jesus, for with Him we can make it through anything that comes our way.

To read my other posts in this series visit here.

31 Days, Articles, Christian Living, Devotionals, Disability

Day 6 – Joy

Philippians 4:4 states, “Rejoice in the Lord always, again I say rejoice.” Note, that this verse does not tell us to only be joyful in the good times but to be joyful always no matter what comes our way. All of us have been through seasons where certain struggles tempt us to be less joyful than others. In my own life recently I have had some health problems, and some days I do not feel like having joy in the midst of them. Other examples could be struggling to find joy in your singleness, the mundane of your job, your marriage, etc. As I have said in previous posts, some days are just plain crappy. Thankfully though, we have the word of God that leads, guides, and helps us to find the joy of Christ each and every day in these and any other situations we may face.

An excellent example in Scripture of a person who displayed joy in good times and in difficult ones was Paul. Paul experienced many hardships and sufferings while following Christ, and Scripture tells us that he dealt with a “thorn in the flesh,” but through it all he remained joyful. Paul tells the secret to this joy and contentment in a letter he wrote to the church of Philippi. Philippians 4:11-13 states, “I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content in whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether fed or hungry, whether in plenty or in want. I can do all things through him who gives me strength.” With Christ, we can endure anything because of His strength that promises to sustain us through whatever comes.

No matter what is going on in and around you, you can still have joy even in the worst of times. That is when Christ can shine the most. It is easy to get caught up in what we want, and be selfish. It is also easy to think that a joyful life is defined by a series of good moments and fulfilled desires.

However, life is really defined by the work Jesus Christ is doing in you, and how He allows the “not so good moments” to mature you.

I want to encourage you today to not let your circumstances steal your joy. Be thankful for what God has given you. Spend time reading His word daily and ask him to give you His never-ending joy, and follow His command to rejoice always! If you do this, the weight of your worries will lessen, and life will suddenly seem brighter. Be encouraged that in his presence their is fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11), and remember that God works out ALL things for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). I am praying for you today as you put into practice this fruit of the spirit and embrace the joy Christ has for you. I ask that you pray the same for me.

31 Days, Articles, Disability, Family

Day 5 -To the Care Takers

There is a group of people who deserve special rewards and they are the care takers of the sick. They are a group of selfless individuals who work tirelessly each day to serve and better the life of the person they are caring for. I have been the recipient of this type of care since January and I am super grateful and humbled by all the generosity that I have received. First, I want to thank my parents who have been with me through thick and thin. They have never left my side and over the past year have sacrificed so much of their time and energy to make sure that I have been cared for. My parents have cleaned up more crap than anyone should ever have to and I am so thankful for them because even in the hard messes of this season, they persevered and will forever be my heroes.

Also, to all of the home health nurses, and therapists who have come out until recently, and to Rita and Evelyn who stayed with me each day when one my parents were not here – THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. I enjoyed getting to know each of you and for the lasting friendships we formed during this time. You all saw me at some of my worst and hardest moments and loved me through it and I am so grateful. I thank God every time I remember you (Philippians 1:3), and I pray he blesses you like you have me.

Take some extra time today and thank the care takers in your life. They deserve it.

31 Days, Articles, Devotionals, Disability

Day 4 – His Grace is Sufficient

So you know how you have ideas of how a day or a week is going to go and then everything falls apart and nothing goes how you imagined. Well, that is what happened to me this week. On Tuesday, I was all excited about the rest of the week because I was going to wake up early every day and have a nice long quiet time, then get lots of writing done. Guess what? It went nothing like that. When you have health problems sometimes they override the best intentioned of plans.

Tuesday morning started out so insane. First, I overslept. Then I get up and had a major disaster with my ileostomy bag that resulted in literally a bunch of crap to clean up. This little episode took a while. Then I dropped my phone and ruined my phone case. Thankfully, the phone survived the drama, but a new phone case, preferably an OtterBox will be on order soon. And all of this happened BEFORE I had my coffee. That tells you how the rest of the day went. Wednesday morning at 3:00am I woke up having severe bladder spasms and had issues all day that caused me to have to take medicine and stay in bed. As a result, I had to cancel appointments and the plans I had made for the day. I apologize to those of you I have frequently cancelled with due to health issues. Your grace is always much appreciated.

Thursday was the same type of day, and my mom and I were leaving to go out of town on Friday. Naturally, I was a bit frustrated and overwhelmed as to how all was going to get done and how my health would hold up. However, that is when the Lord so sweetly reminded me of truth from His word in 2 Corinthians 12:9 which states, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” Everything maybe didn’t get done the way I had planned but things were still okay in the end, and God reminded me that instead of getting upset to rest in His amazing grace. He has control of everything and in my weaknesses He is strong.

So whatever you are struggling with today, or if you feel overwhelmed with the task in front of you, take a moment to stop and pray. Rest in the grace and strength that God so freely gives to anyone who asks and that will give you a whole new perspective.

31 Days, Articles, Disability, Family, Friendship

Day 3 – Cleaning Up the Stereotypes

Stereotypes are something that have always been and always will be in existence. However, that does not make them less annoying and less hurtful. No one is perfect and I think if honest, we have all been guilty of giving stereotypes to someone or something whether it be intentional or unintentional.

As someone who has been a victim of stereotyping, I try to look at people for who they really are and not judging them for who I think they are. I have a disability called Cerebral Palsy, and because of that I walk with arm-crutches. Over the years I have received special and somewhat degrading treatment because of this. There is usually not a day that goes by when out in public that I do not receive “the look,” or special treatment from someone. After dealing with this for thirty years I have grown not to pay it attention, but nevertheless it is still there. When I refer to “the look” I am talking about the gaze or stare that I receive from another person which usually displays pity.

I realize that the people giving these looks do not mean any harm but they are just not sure how to respond.

A recent example of this happened last weekend. I went out with my mom to the movies and to do some shopping. While shopping I used a wheelchair because since the surgery my energy is not what it used to be. However, all through the day I just kept noticing “the looks.” It was stare after stare and after a while one just wonders — “okay seriously, have you people never seen a wheelchair before?” “Do I have something on my face or in my hair?” (Note, that I am being a bit funny here but seriously it can be a frustration).

I used to travel frequently for my job, and a lot of times at the airport the easiest way for me to get assistance was to use a wheelchair. On my last flight, during the security process, the officers treated me different and did not listen to anything I had to say. Instead, they spoke to my friend and told her to tell me certain things. That was when my friend and I both spoke up insisting that I could speak for myself and that I had a mind of my own. Just because one uses crutches or a wheelchair for assistance does not mean they are less independent or successful than other people. It also does not indicate that a person has a mental disability along with the physical one, even though that is a common misconception. Some people can look past it and others cannot. I had someone tell me once that he thought disabled people wanted pity to which I responded, “no we just want normal treatment.”

I am fortunate that I have friends and family who love, support, and encourage me, and I learned a long time ago not to let these stereotypes of me define who I am. Jesus Christ defines me and I am so thankful for His love and grace.

I know I am not the only person struggling with stereotypes today and I want to encourage you not to let stereotypes and “crappy” treatment or thoughts from others define you. You are worth way more than that!

Everyone has a disability, some are just more visible than others. I want to challenge everyone this week to look past appearances and stereotypes and treat others the way you would want to be treated.

31 Days, Articles, Disability, Friendship

Day 2 – Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,I know that full well.” ~Psalm 139:14

Psalm 139:14 states that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. However, if we are honest, somedays I know that we don’t feel that way, or at least I do not. And that has been my sentiment as of late. Since my surgery, I have had issues with my weight and retaining fluid. One day my weight is up and another it is down. My hair has also not recovered from the trauma of all I have gone through and on certain days, “bad hair day” does not even begin to describe the state my hair is in. Even my lovely mother who is a hair-dresser has no clue what to do with it. I know I am in a hot mess on the days not even my mom can work miracles. Ha.

Also, there is the issue of “the bag.” I have an illeostomy bag due to my colon being removed, and do not worry, I will spare you most of the details. However, this bag causes disasters from time to time and it has caused a major upset to my clothes closet. A lot of my clothes do not work anymore because of this, or rather, they don’t look the same. The first day I got ready to go somewhere post-op and post hospital I had a meltdown in my closet and yelled out, “I have absolutely no clothes to wear!!” Many would think I was exaggerating but it was true. Well, mostly true! 😉

Although, once I calmed down, I realized that this just gives me an excuse to shop and what girl doesn’t like the thought of that. It also helps when your best friend’s family owns the cutest clothing boutiques (MimiBella – check them out. They are awesome), and who immediately drops what she is doing to help me find me some new clothes. That is a true friend right there. Love you, Sara!

Seriously though, I know that all women have days where we do not feel beautiful enough, and go through seasons where we feel nothing is right — which takes me back to Psalm 139:14. It is true, even when we do not “feel” like it, that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.”

There is nothing about our bodies or health that God has not created or does not understand. We are made in His glorious image, and because of that we are beautiful.

It is because of that truth, that I am able to get up every day and move forward with confidence even in the midst of major changes to my life physically, emotionally, and spiritually. In the midst of all my “crap,” God is here and He is giving me the strength to carry on. And dear sisters, He will give you the strength to do the same so let that be encouragement to you today.

Christian Living, Disability

Hello, September

Okay so yesterday September 1, 2015. Where is the time going? This year is flying by and I am sad to say that summer is leaving. I will miss the pool time so I am soaking up every bit of time out by the pool that I can get. However, I know that there are some good things ahead for the fall such as FOOTBALL. I am just a little excited! Go Gamecocks! Go Patriots! I will try to keep my football posts to a minimum but I can’t promise..haha!

Seriously though, as I look ahead to the next couple of months, I am not sure what God has planned but I am trying to remember that He does indeed have a plan. This past weekend I saw the movie, “War Room.” If you have not seen it yet I highly recommend that you go to the theaters and watch it. It is a wonderful Christian film with a heavy focus on prayer, and was a much needed reminder for me of the power prayer has in our lives. As I have mentioned in recent posts, I have been concerned with health issues and what my future looks like health-wise and in general. So much change has occurred in the past six months but as I have been worrying the Lord has made me remember what Philippians 4:6-7 states, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” Instead of spending time worrying about what’s next I need to spend that time praying and being thankful for what God has already done in my life. Scripture has a way of putting things into perspective and offering the comfort and peace that comes from no one else other than Jesus. For that, I am so thankful.

Spend time in prayer with the Lord today and give over whatever worries you have to Him. Have a great Wednesday!

Articles, Disability

Thanks For The Prayers

Hi sweet friends. Thank you for all the prayers and encouraging words regarding my procedure yesterday. All went well, and no complications other than an allergic reaction to an antibiotic, but that was not major. I will not know if the botox is working for about two weeks. Then at the beginning of October I will visit with my urologist again and he will do in-depth tests on my bladder to see if it has made progress with the botox, and after that we will know how we should proceed. Please pray that the botox works and that it will help bring healing and relief to my bladder. Thanks again for all the prayers. I hope you all have a wonderful Wednesday.

Articles, Christian Living, Disability

Health Update

2015 has been quite the journey for me thus far. I turned 30 this year and I joked with someone the other day that I want a 30 do-over and that I hope 31 is kinder to my health. Although, since my last surgery in February, I have made some wonderful progress, and over the last couple of weeks I have started getting out and doing more activities. I even made it to church and that was a huge blessing because I have not been physically able to go in so long. I realize these things are not major for most people, but for me they are. That being said, I have definitely been feeling hopeful about the days to come. However, since this last surgery, I have been having problems with my bladder. I have had bladder issues for years and have had multiple surgeries for it. Over the last few years things have been under control — until now. To make a really long story short, I have bladder problems from Cerebral Palsy, and had bladder surgery when I was in 7th grade where the surgeon completely rebuilt my bladder. But in recent tests we have found that my bladder has majorly shrunk in size which is the reason for the issues I am having. Unfortunately, we believe my colon surgery as well as treatments and extended time in the hospital are probably the causes of this. At this point the treatment for my situation consists of two things: Botox in my bladder and eventually another major bladder surgery where my bladder will be removed. Depending on how the Botox works this surgery could occur one or three years from now. As you can imagine, this was not the news I was hoping to hear and in the moment I asked God, “What are you doing? I don’t even begin to understand this. Can my body undergo yet another major surgery and be okay? What about my hopes, dreams, and when can I get back to life as normal? ”

But after much prayer, God reminded me not to worry about tomorrow and focus only on things of today as He commands in Matthew 6:34. He has given me so much to be thankful for. He is continually restoring and giving me life. Yes, I may have major bladder surgery in my future, and it may come sooner than I would like, but if and when that occurs God will be with me like He always has. I am not being obedient to God and His Word by worrying about the what-ifs and creating scenarios of what might happen in my mind. That is me giving into my fears instead of turning them over to Christ. Why is it that we make things harder on ourselves than they have to be instead of letting the peace of Christ rule in our hearts? I want to encourage you today that no matter what your worries, fears, or circumstances are Christ is strong enough to take care of them all. Give them over to Him, and let His strength carry you.

I believe greatly in the power of prayer and I know prayer is one of the main reasons I am here today. Tomorrow morning (Tuesday) I have to go into the hospital for a small procedure to have botox put in my bladder. Please pray that all goes well with that, and most importantly pray that the botox works. If it works well then it could be 2-3 years before the major surgery so please pray this brings some much needed relief. Also, pray for healing of my bladder to where surgery could not be needed down the road. I would love to pray for you as well so please let me know how I can be lifting you up. Thanks for your continued prayers and encouragement. I hope your Monday is going well.

Photo taken by my friend Sara Rettig.

Articles, Books, Disability, Family, Friendship, Music, Reading

Gratitude

Two weeks ago, Pastor Pete Wilson of Crosspoint Church in Nashville preached a wonderful message on gratitude and at the end of it challenged each of us to share five things that we were grateful for every day for five days. This was known on social media as#‎5for5CP‬. Below are some things that I shared each day. If you are alive, you have something to be grateful for. Spend some time today thanking God for the gifts he has blessed you with.

#‎5for5CP – Day 1

1. I am super thankful for the friendship and sisterhood I share with @sara_at_mimibellas. Thankful for the continued encouragement she gives to me each day and the truth she speaks in my life. ‪#‎bestfriends‬ ‪#‎kindredspirits‬
2. Encouragement from the word – Psalm 119
3. Good books – My current read is “What Keeps You Up at Night” by Pete Wilson.
4. Diet Coke with Lime – ‪#‎itsthelittlethings‬
5. Good music – I have the album “Little Songs” by Jon Guerra on repeat! So good!

#‎5for5CP‬ – Day 2

I’m so grateful for all of my furbabies! 🐶🐶🐶🐶🐶
1. Lucy Lou
2. Coco
3. Tebow
4. Anne Girl
5. Rowdy Girl

‪#‎5for5CP‬ – Day 3

1. Days like today spent by the pool
2. Summertime
3. My recovery. 2015 has been a hard year so far for my health but God is restoring me and bringing healing in His time.
4. My current view. Such a beautiful day!
5. Sunshine 🔆🔆🔆

‪#‎5for5CP‬ Day 4 –

1. The dear friendship I share with @caseyrummy! So thankful God allowed us to be friends. I love your weekly visits with Malakai. They encourage me every time and also keep me sane haha! Love you! 💜
2.Malakai – love this little guy so much! He brings me constant joy!‪#‎ThursdaysWithMalalkai‬
3.Strawberry Lemonade from McDonalds – my weekly treat from @caseyrummy! Delicious!
4.Dinner brought to me by my dad from my favorite local restaurant, Jans! Love their chicken and their salads! So good.
5. Encouragement from the Word today! Philippians 3:13-14

‪#‎5for5CP‬ Day 5 –

1. I’m forever grateful for the wonderful and Godly parents that I have been blessed with. So thankful to have them as my best friends. Thanks for never leaving my side this year, and for taking such good care of me while I’ve been sick. Also, most importantly thanks for being examples of Jesus in my life. Love you! 😘
2. Family – Love you all! 💜
3. Life – 2014 and 2015 have been extremely tough due to some health issues and I am so thankful for the gift of of being alive. Thankful to Jesus for the joy of today.
4. Hebrews 6:19 ⚓
5. Prayers and encouragement from friends – Thanks to all of you who have prayed, encouraged, and supported our family during this season. We are thankful for and love you all.