Christian Living Archives - Page 5 of 14

Words of Wisdom from Amy Carmichael

If you have followed my blog for a while then you knew that one of my favorite women is Amy Carmichael. Even though she did not live during modern times, I feel that she and I relate in many areas. As I read her different devotionals I feel as if I’m reading from the pages of my journal. I am so thankful for the words of wisdom that she had brought to me, and how God has used her life to minster to my heart. Aside from Scripture her words have been a balm to my weary soul.. Amy is the perfect example of using what God has taught her in both the joys and trials to share with others the love of Jesus. She lived to completely glorify Him until the day she died, and I am so thankful that her legacy lives on today.

Amy was a missionary in India for many years, but later in life dealt with physical illnesses and suffering that left her homebound. During that time she wrote about things that the Lord was teaching her. Last night I read this quote from her that helped put things in perspective for me. She states,”Above all there is this, look at Calvary. Look steadfastly. Take time to look and all within you will be hushed. For power streams forth from Calvary. We never need to know defeat.”

Wow! When I read that it reminded me of what Jesus did for me on the cross and that I am not alone in my suffering. There is nothing that I am experiencing that Jesus can’t relate to, and He is always by my side offering His comfort and strength. I do not know what you are facing today but whether it is joyful or sorrowful, take time to dwell on Calvary and take comfort in the healing presence of Jesus. As Jesus said, “In this world you will have trouble, but take heart I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33). Praise God for that promise, and for the gift of Jesus,. With Him we can make it through anything that comes our way.

For more encouragement from Amy, check out her devotional, “Edges of His Ways”here. All of her books are wonderful and will lead you straight to the word of Scripture. I pray that her words bring comfort to you as they have me.

Articles, Blog Series, Christian Living, Devotionals, Disability

Set Your Mind on Things Above

Happy Wednesday friends. It’s the middle of the week and I pray wherever you are that your week is going well. In my time with the Lord lately the following verse from Colossians 3:2 has been coming to mind. It states,“Set your mind on things above, not on earthly things.”

So much of a persons joy and contentment comes from our perspective. It all comes down to what we are feeding our minds with each day. For example, is your days spent worrying and fretting over the “what ifs” in life, or are you surrendering those thoughts to the Lord? Are you watching, reading, or listening to anything that triggers discontentment or envy? It is easy to allow our minds to be filled with worry, stress, anger, etc., especially during a difficult season. At times you may wonder why you cannot get certain thoughts from your minds, or why you cannot feel God’s presence in a situation. However, if we are dwelling on the things of this world, that can produce in us discontent, fear, and worry.

I love HGTV and shows like “Fixer Upper,” “Rehab Addict,” etc. In and of themselves they are not bad, and may seem harmless. Although, if watching them makes you discontent or envious with what you have then you may need to reevaluate your viewing habits. Another example is if you are constantly afraid and filled with fear regarding certain situations — are you watching shows that make the fearful thoughts in your mind worse? Are you reading books that keep your mind in a constant state of fretting?

One last example is one that I have been guilty of in the past has to do with Facebook and Pinterest. It is so easy to scroll through the feeds and begin comparing yourselves to others. These social media outlets tend to help folks make life look picture perfect, but nobody’s life is perfect. When it seems like others have the perfect house, the perfect health, a wonderful husband, etc., it can stir up thoughts and feelings in our hearts before we know what hit us. These outlets are not bad in themselves, but if we allow them to grow seeds of jealousy, discontentment, and bitterness then it is time to take a step back from them.

This post is part of “The View Looks Fine From Here” series that I started last week. Being homebound and bedbound leaves a lot of time for me to dwell on life and thoughts like never before. Some days I do not even leave my bedroom and “view” is not very exciting. Because of this, I try to be guarded in how I fill my mind. Life is hard and dealing with a chronic illness everyday is not easy. I learned a long time ago that if I was going to have the right mindset during these circumstances that I needed to be guarded with how I spent my time — what I am watching, reading, listening to, etc. I am sick enough without adding in worries, discontentment, and jealousy. My days and suffering are so much easier to deal with when I am focusing on ” the things above,” and not on my current circumstances.

Below are some questions I came up with a couple years ago to help me with this, and I recently found them, and been using them again. I pray that they help you keep your eyes fixed on Jesus, and that you allow His peace and joy to fill your hearts and mind daily.

Questions to Ask Ourselves:

1. Are the television shows and movies I am watching glorifying to the Lord? How do I feel once I’ve watched it? Does it make me have sinful thoughts or attitude?

2. Does the music I listen to glorify the Lord? Does it cause me to want to draw closer to Him or does it make me discontent? Does it change my perspective for the better?

3. Does the books and magazines I read glorify the Lord or do they bring negative thoughts to my mind?

4. Does the conversations I engage in glorify the Lord or myself? Does the words I use affirm others or tear others down?

Also, below are some Bible verses that have helped me along the way regarding these areas, and I pray they encourage you as you focus your gaze on Christ, and surrender to Him daily.

Bible Verses:

Philippians 4: 8-9 – “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”

Romans 12:2 – “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Proverbs 4:23 – “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”

Ephesians 4:22-24 – “To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.”

Christian Living

Pity Into Praise

The past few weeks I have not slept well, and have been woken up for one reason or another. Most recently I have not slept because of severe pain and nausea and the side effects from treatments which made me frustrated. Then I had a come to Jesus meeting that put my pity party in its place. I’m sure in your own struggles you know exactly what I mean. Then the Lord helped me find praise instead of pity. I promise you that in the bleakest of times if you stop and ask the Lord to give you some praise in your situation, He will. [clickToTweet tweet=”God may not change your circumstance but He can certainly change your perspective.” quote=”God may not change your circumstance but He can certainly change your perspective.”] That being said, during my sleepless nights lately I have tried to find the joy instead of lamenting or thinking about how hard things are.

A couple activities that are helping me keep the right attitude during these sleepless nights are praying and reading devotional a and biographies from some of my heroes in the faith. The Lord has shown me that these unexpected wake up calls provide an excellent time to pour out my heart to the Lord and to ponder His Word. It has aso helped as I’ve read the stories of many others who have gone before me such as Elisabeth Elliot, Amy Carmichael, and Darlene Rose, just to name a few. The same God who walked them through the fires they faced in life can carry me as well. I’m not the only one facing a trial and I won’t be the last one so it’s comforting to know we are not alone.

The next time you find yourself not able to sleep, spend that time talking to God asking Him to turn your pity into praise. I promise you that He will not disappoint, and He will give you the inner peace and rest your soul so desperately needs.

Christian Living

Joy In the Midst of Suffering

We all go through trials and struggles and we will continue to do so until we reach Heaven. As Christians God never promises an easy life but He does promise to carry us through whatever it is we are facing. Lately, I have been very overwhelmed. I’ve been dealing with these chronic kidney/bladder infections for so long, and the past few weeks have been difficult. I feel like I can barely keep my head above water. Even though this week has been one of my hardest, God has shown up and reminded me that I am not alone. As I was beginning to have my own personal pity party, God reminded me to “be still and recognize that He is God” (Psalm 46:10). He is the author of life and the creator of the universe and when I’m dealing with worry, fear, and allow my emotions to be defined by my pity, I am basically saying that I don’t trust that God is big enough to handle my situation. The Devil loves for our thoughts and actions to be defeated, and wants to stop us from allowing our pain to be used for God’s glory. Recently after feeling sorry for myself I spent time with the Lord repenting and crying out to Him and while my circumstances did not change, my perspective did. The best way to battle these issues is by soaking up the word. Every time that I go for a while without reading the Bible, the negative and worrisome thoughts begin to creep in my heart and mind.

Several things that have kept me sane and at peace during this season are:

reading or listening w Bible
Crying out to Jesus in prayer and to pray His Word.
Talking to friends and praying for them
Fill my mind with good things by listening to sermons and reading encouraging stories of people who have suffered well for Jesus.
Writing – each day no matter how hard, I try to ask God to show me what I like to call “little joys” and I try to write them down when I can.

When I am faithful and consistent in doing these things, God is always faithful in giving me what I need to make it through. The times that I make excuses about not feeling like reading the Bible or praying, that is when I needed it the most. I am grateful that in this world we will have trouble but we can take heart because God has overcome the world (John 16:33). Because encouraged my friends. Spend some time with Jesus today and allow His peace to flood your heart. He always give us reasons to “hope a little more.”

Articles, Christian Living, Devotionals, Disability, Family, Friendship, The View Looks Fine From Here

Hospice, Hospital beds, Oxygen, and Super Heroes Oh My!

Hospice, Hospital beds, lift chairs, oxygen, and super heroes oh my! I titled my post that because the past few weeks have been crazy with so much happening healthwise. My once cute room is now filled with multiple medical supplies. I laugh just thinking about what might be brought in next. Haha! When my friend Kristin visited a few weeks ago she brought super hero decorations and decorated my equipment. It was fitting because lately I have needed an extra dose of super hero power in my days. It is hilarious and I love it.

On to other health news, for months many of you have prayed for the Lord to provide a miracle and to allow there to be a cancellation with Dr Kinnelly in Charlotte so I could see him before October. God heard your prayers and he had some last minute cancellations recently, and I was so happy to receive that telephone call. However, the end result was not what we wanted to hear, but I was also not surprised. It is a long story but Dr. K was not respectful of my time or the suffering that I’ve experienced. His bedside manner is not the best but he is brilliant. I was in his office for three hours and by the end was exhausted. Basically he had not reviewed any of my files and had no idea what was going on. At first he tried to say my problems might not be infection related. But when he finally realized the true facts of my condition he said that unfortunately nothing else could be done except for what we were already doing.

The root of my problem is that my bladder cannot fully empty which in turn causes chronic infections. Also, because I have a neurogenic bladder from CP, it continues to get more sluggish over time. Due to the bladder surgeries I have had earlier in life nothing else can be done surgically for this either. Therefore, I will continue to treat these infections until they can’t be treated anymore under the guidance of my infectious disease doctor and hospice. Fast forward a few weeks to now.

The week before last I felt a flare up with my bladder starting. However, because of being on antibiotics continually the test came back with a false reading. The result was negative and I was hoping it would stay away for a while but it didn’t. Days later I ended up in the ER. critically ill with a kidney infection that went sepsis so I spent a few days in the hospital. Had I not went in when I did, I would not have made it through the night. I will forever be thankful for the room full of nurses and doctors frantically working with me trying to get me in stable condition. Praise Jesus the treatments they gave me has attacked the infection and has worked the best of any medications I have had recently. I came home now and still on some powerful antibiotics which seem to be working. Unfortunately the meds I’m on are making me extremely nauseous. The side effects are brutal and even worse because of how weak I am, but worth if it keeps the infection under control. I have also been referred to another ID doctor in Charlotte. I had the opportunity to Skype with him recently and was very impressed. There is no cure for my situation but he seemed hopeful about possible treatments to keep infections down for longer periods of time. My appointment with him is on August 9th so my prayer is that I can hold my own and not have to go to the hospital again before then.

Overall, my prognosis can be discouraging at times, but I am grateful to know the facts and that we are doing everything that can possibly be done to help me.. We are all on the same page with things and I am glad for that. That is what I’ve been praying for. I am a realist and like to know the truth of the matter even if it is not what I want to hear.

If I dwell on my situation too much, it can be scary with so much uncertainty for my future and health. But my hope is in Jesus and no matter what doctors say, or how bad the infection may be, God is greater than all of that. As Amy Carmichael says, “In acceptance lieth peace.” Accepting circumstances is not giving up. It is being content with Jesus wherever He has you. Acceptance brings peace.“[clickToTweet tweet=”Accepting circumstances is not giving up. It is being content with Jesus wherever He has you. Acceptance brings peace.” quote=”Accepting circumstances is not giving up. It is being content with Jesus wherever He has us. Acceptance brings peace.”]”

God and I have had 32 years together and He has never let me down and has brought me through the fire so many times. This week God keeps bringing Lamentations 3:22-23 to mind. It states, “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” [clickToTweet tweet=”Because of God’s compassion and faithfulness , our suffering does not have to consume us because His love never fails” quote=”Because of God’s compassion and faithfulness , our suffering does not have to consume us because His love never fails”].

In the midst of hard days, God has also provided some amazing encouragement through the people in my life. In addition to the hospice nurses and therapists, over the past few weeks I have had wonderful company from friends and family from both near and far. Not everyone in what I call my inner circle – lives nearby but my people have shown up and I have the best community of friends a girl could ask for. My favorite part of the last few weeks has been the quality time I’ve spent with friends, especially friends I don’t get to see often because of where they live. There is nothing sweeter than visiting with best friends and loved ones. I’m so humbled and blessed by the people God has put in my life over the years and these sweet friends of mine ( you know who you are) have been with me through thick and thin. Thanks to everyone for the visits, calls, notes, gifts, and most importantly thank you for all the prayers. I’m so grateful for the mighty group of prayer warriors who daily lift me up to the Father, and for holding me up when I’m weak. I am forever thankful to each one of you. Your prayers and support gives me strength to press on, and a reason to hope a little more with each day that comes.. I love you all and hope you are enjoying your summer holiday. My prayer for you this weekend is that you would spend time at the feet of Jesus and find rest for your souls.

31 Days - Nehemiah, Articles, Blog Series, Christian Living, Devotionals

Monday Encouragement

Happy Monday, friends! Many of you are enjoying today as a long weekend celebrating Memorial Day. For me, I am experiencing today as all other days at home in bed. The beginning of summer has always been a favorite of mine, and I miss being outside experiencing the warm and beautiful weather. However, while I would love to be hanging out by the pool, lake, cookouts, or traveling with friends — currently these are not realistic activities for me during this season. Although the Lord who is extremely gracious, keeps showing me what I used to consider mundane is now beautiful. That is such a gift. One of the ways God uses to encourage me on daily basis is uplifting sermons and talks from those I respect spiritually.

Laying in bed day after day, I try to listen and watch different things that are encouraging and challenging for my mind. One of my favorite sermons of all time is from pastor and author Eric Ludy and is about Nehemiah. Eric first preached this sermon a couple years ago and based it on Nehemiah and his leadership qualities. I learn something new every time I listen. Since I am now doing a series on the blog about Nehemiah this message is the perfect addition to it and what I needed specifically for this week ahead.

. The sermon is called “The 9 Lies,” and below is the message description from the Ellerslie website.

The 9 Lies Sermon from Eric Ludy on Nehemiah.

“The Christian man or woman represents the greatest threat to Satan’s agenda and thusly they are the brunt of his most cruel energies and most cunning stratagems. But we are not left without a defense. The book of Nehemiah showcases how this battle works. Those opposed to Nehemiah were determined to stop the building of the walls of Jerusalem, and in their opposition, they attempted to cajole Nehemiah with nine distinct lies. These lies are the very same ones used against you and me today. First, we must recognize them as lies, and then we must learn how to respond to each of them with the Word of God as our primary weapon.”

This sermon is a much needed reminder of how Satan tries to fill our minds and circumstances with his lies, but Christ is so much bigger and His love always wins! The Devil cannot stand to see someone like Nehemiah who is continually being obedient to the Lord especially during adversity. Some of the lies regarding Nehemiah’s situation are some of the same ones the Devil has tried to hit me with during my sickness. However, praise the Lord for Nehemiah’s faith in the Lord and for the strength God gave him.

The same strength God gave Nehemiah can also be given to us. One of the ways to beat adversity is by daily putting on the armor of God. As stated in Ephesians 6: 1o-11,

“Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.”

Life and days can get busy with work, kids, marriage, etc., but I encourage you to take some time to listen to this message from Pastor Ludy. No matter what circumstances you are experiencing, I think you will find this sermon uplifting and applicable in your days ahead.

Articles, Christian Living, Devotionals, Disability, Family, Friendship, Holidays

Health Update – Hope a Little More Part 3

As I lay here in my bed not able to sleep I’m thinking about how crazy things have been. The last week or so has been a whirlwind to say the least. If you have been following my journey you know that I’ve been sick for the past year but these last few weeks have taken things to a whole new level.

First, I was transferred to Hospice care, but that is a Godsend and I’m so thankful for their services. We then spent time introducing me to the program and adjusting my meds/care as needed. Unfortunately during this process I began having more pain, nausea, and my fluid retention had worsened. When the nurse examined me on Thursday we thought my system was reacting to the new medication plan so we decided to move me to Hospice House for a few days in hopes of making me more comfortable. Though in the end it was decided that going to the ER was the best choice. After some tests, Shelby transferred me to Dr. Dobson in Charlotte due to what they thought was a bowel obstruction. Although, on further observation from Dobson, it was a sluggish bowel/chronic ileus instead. My bowel, bladder, and digestive system have always been lazy due to my Cerebral Palsy and as I get older all these areas have worsened which is the cause of the majority of medical problems I am experiencing.

In the past few months I have dealt with a lot of fluid retention, but my physicians have been unsure of the cause. However, when Dr. Dobson examined my case he said my fluid was from my system being sluggish, which made things back up. For the first four days of being hospitalized I was on a no fluid/drink regiment. Thankfully, that helped things move along better and I’m now able to tolerate solids. Although I am still experiencing pain and nausea, that is something I will continue to have from time to time. I will forever have G.I. issues and these flare ups could happen more often, but all we can do is manage the symptoms in the best way possible.

I do not expect a cure all at this point but it is very discouraging to hear that nothing can be done except what we have already been doing. This comes from the doctor who is always so optimistic and a doer. When I was in the hospital for six weeks a couple of years ago he never gave a negative prognosis even when things were terminal, which means there really is “no easy fix,” for this as Dobson stated.

Thanks be to God though that resting my system for almost a week and getting iv meds and fluids have helped. Now,mmpi pray things can be maintained with the meds I have been given. I am supposed to follow up with my G.I. doctor soon to see if he has any further recommendations.

On a brighter note, God has been giving me little gems of encouragement each day. He continues to remind me that He knows and sees me. One of those occurrences happened last Thursday. In the ambulance being transported from a Shelby to Charlotte, I prayed for God to give me an understanding and compassionate nurse — specifically a nurse I knew from previous stays at CMC-Mercy named Maime. I knew that probably wouldn’t happen because I did not know if she still worked there plus this was a large hospital with many nurses/doctors. However, after arriving and taken to my room, guess who walked in to be my nurse?? Maime. Tears filled my eyes and I immediately sent thanks and praise to Jesus, and told Maime she was an answer to prayer — literally. That was the evidence my heart needed to confirm I was where I was supposed to be and that God saw and understood me in my circumstances.

During my hospital stay lots of visitors came which no matter how bad I felt brought encouragement. Just having some of my close friends and family laughing and talking around me ministered to my soul deeply. I love being around people and even though I wasn’t able to talk much on certain days or if I fell asleep while you were there (Sorry Becky…ha!)! Also, God displayed His love to me yet again through my parents. The entire time I was there, one if not both of them were with me, and one always stayed at night. Their love and sacrifice in caring for me on a daily basis is humbling and I cannot ever thank them enough. Love you mom and dad! Y’all are my favorites and I’m so glad God gave me you as parents.

Having health issues is hard, but God has surrounded me with the right medical staff at the hospital and now at home through my Hospice nurses Jodie and Jill. I have not known them for long but they have stepped in so gracefully to do what needed to be done. The month of April and the beginning of May have been extra hard because it seemed we had hit a dead end wall, but the Lord carried me through and provided the help I needed and did so in ways I did not expect.

I want to encourage you that no matter how hard life can be God will give strength you did not know you were capable of . One of my favorite verses has always been Nehemiah 8:10 which states, “Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” This is a verse that I’ve often used and heard over the years, but take forgranted its meaning. However, lately God has reminded me that no matter how bad my day is or how sick I feel, I have no reason to wallow in my grief and despair.

Instead of grieving, we need to surrender each moment to the Lord and He will always give us the strength to face whatever is in front of us, and His joy will shine through.

That same joy is also how God allows me to “hope a little more” with each day that comes my way.

Thanks again for all of your prayers and encouragement. I will be posting more as I feel like it in the next week. I hope you all enjoy the Memorial Day weekend and that God gives you the refreshment you need.

Articles, Christian Living, Devotionals, Holidays

Happy Memorial Day Weekend

Happy Memorial Day Weekend. For many, Memorial Day is just another long weekend, first weekend by the pool, or a time to get together with family and friends for a barbecue. Even though those are all good things, it is more important than those things and the reason deserves our time and respect. Memorial Day represents the bravery of men and women who died fighting for our freedom. Without their sacrifice we would not be able to have the freedoms we enjoy today. No matter what your plans are for the weekend be sure to pray and thank God for these brave souls who sacrificed their lives so that we could go about our days having freedom to live life in the way that we choose. Our days can get busy and it is easy to get caught up in our own selfish desires. However, we need to be reminded that the reason life can be easy for us now is because of the actions of others who have gone before us. The freedom I am most thankful for as an American is that I am able to worship Jesus Christ and serve Him freely. That is such a gift and privilege I too often take forgranted.

Happy Memorial Day from Lucy Lou!

I love spending Memorial Day with family, and in normal circumstances would be so excited to have the pool open and enjoy the quality time it offers being with folks that I love. However, the pool here won’t be open for another week or so and currently I am too sick to swim. But God knew just what my heart needed most this weekend — and that is a getaway with a Him. The past few weeks for me can only be described as a whirlwind and I am just now able to see through the fog. A few days ago I thought I may be spending this weekend in the hospital but I am so thankful to now be at home.

For the past three years at the beginning of every summer the Set Apart Girl Ministry from Leslie Ludy hosts a women’s conference in Windsor, Colorado. This year the conference falls on Memorial Day Weekend. I have never been able to attend the conference in person but I am grateful they offer the option of a simulcast. It is during these times that I thank God for technology. Leslie always calls the conference “A Getaway with Jesus,” and I have never needed the conference more than I do now. The theme of the conference is about being a bravehearted woman. Earlier, I peeked at the conference notes, and I can already tell that God is going to challenge and encourage me. Lately, during my time with the Lord, He has been reminding me over and over to stand firm, take courage, and wait for Him. Therefore, yesterday when I read one of the theme verses for the conference I knew this is where the Lord wanted me. The verse is from 1 Corinthians 13:16 whigh states, “Watch, stand fast in the faith, be brave, be strong.” Not only is this the theme for the weekend, but for this season of my life as well.

While some will be spending their weekend by laying on the beach or by the pool, mine will be spent relaxing in bed watching some of my favorite speakers teach. The Set Apart weekend is always one of my favorite weekends of the year, and I know this year will be no different. I always say that the Lord knows my love language better than anyone else, and this is just another example of that. Even though life has been hard recently, God continues to give me reasons to “hope a little more” with each day that comes. I hope that each of you have a wonderful and refreshing holiday weekend, and that you take some time to focus on its importance.

P.S. It is not too late to join in on the conference. It is live this weekend but all sessions will be available for streaming through August. However, it will no longer be available for purchase after June 1. These sessions would be perfect for a summer study. For more information visit here.

Articles, Christian Living, Devotionals, Disability, Family, Reading

Hospice…the Word I never thought I would be happy to hear…Hospice

Last week started out as any other week, but the last few days have been a whirlwind for me (So sorry for the long post that is ahead..ha!) As many of you know I have been receiving home health care and palliative to help for my chronic bladder infections. However, over time instead of getting better the infections have gotten progressively worse, and the weaker I have become. Being housebound and bedbound has been a challenge and over the last couple of months I have retained a lot of fluid –so much fluid that it makes it hard for me to move well.

When I visited my urology PA in Charlotte two weeks ago she did not do anything except keep me on the same plan the infectious disease doctor had me on. Because my bladder situation is so rare and complicated it seems we have reached the point of treating the infections until sadly they cannot be treated anymore. We have went to other physicians in the state for advice, but Dr. K in Charlotte is the most qualified for my case. Therefore, we have exhausted all other avenues for help unless Dr. K has a better solution in October, but that seems unlikely.

I have great respect for Dr. Love who is my former palliative doctor and now my General Practitioner, and her nurses Debbie and Amy. A long time ago Dr. Love and I had a discussion about Hospice and I told her to be honest and tell me if she ever thought I needed hospice care. She assured me she would, and last Wednesday following a visit from her nurses, they called and told me they thought hospice would be the best plan for me at the moment.

As mentioned earlier, over the last couple of months I have retained a large amount of fluid and have become significantly weaker. Because of this and other reasons, it would be best for me to have nurses visit me a couple times a week to moniter the fluid, the infections, and my pain. Hospice can do this in ways that palliative and home health cannot, and are able to consult with their physicians and mine to determine what needs to be done for me on a day to day basis. They are also able to take regular urine cultures, prescribe meds, and do blood work and such all at my house which is very helpful right now. It is our goal that Hospice will help me build up some strength and recuperate. I could be discharged in a couple months or stay on as long as I need them.

Whether it be a few months or years I am so thankful to have their assistance right now. It has been such a blessing. I never thought I would be glad to hear the word hospice in regards to me, but even in the short time of receiving their care, they have helped so much. They truly do desire to make the patient comfortable. I am already receiving medicine and supplies from them including a new wheelchair. My sweet nurses Jodie and Jill have been so good to work with and patiently answers all of our questions. So many (myself included), hear the word hospice and automatically think of death or end of life care. While that can be true they can also provide respite and recuperation for cases like mine. Realistically my situation could be terminal and could go in that direction at anytime. However, thankfully the current antibiotic treatment I’m on is working right now and my prayer is that different treatments will help me for a long time to come. Regardless of what I need in the future, I’m thankful to have the specific care from hospice that I have today.

My family and I have been praying for the help that I have needed, and the Lord has so graciously answered those prayers through Hospice. Even though this is the right next step for my health I will miss all my sweet nurses from Healthy at Home. Ya’ll have been in my life and home for two years and I will be forever grateful for your care. I love each of you and will greatly miss the joy and the laughter you brought my way on the bad days.

I do not know what my future holds or how much longer I will be on this earth. None of us can ever really know those details but chronic/terminal illness has a way of making you realize what is truly important in life. Lately, I have been reminded of that more than ever and it has brought me closer to Jesus.

My view these days are what I can see from the hospital bed located in my bedroom and for the longest time I thought that limited my view but with open hands and an open heart the Lord has changed my perspective and shown me how to find all the beauty and joy I need from right here. Even in these hard circumstances God has continued to show me His goodness and has challenged me to continue to have courage and wait and lean on Him. Psalm 27:13-14 says it perfectly:

“I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.Wait for the Lord;
Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord.”

Thanks again for all the prayers. They mean the world and encourage me so much. This has been a hard few days because my treatment regiment for pain is being changed. Lots of pain, nauesea, and swelling but until my body is adjusted I will be having more pain than usual. Pray that the doctors and nurses continue to have wisdom to know how to make me comfortabe and that I will gain strength each day. While we are thankful for Hospice, it is still sad to know that I need their help. No one wants to need Hospice, so please pray for continued peace for my heart and mind. Stay tuned to the blog for future updates. Also, I will continue to write about my study of the book of Nehemiah throughout the summer, so be on the lookout for that!

I hope everyone is having a wonderful Wednesday!

Articles, Blog Series, Christian Living, Disability, The View Looks Fine From Here, Uncategorized

The View a Looks Fine From Here – The Struggle is Real

Hey friends. Normally I post about Nehemiah on Thursdays but I’m a bit behind this week so I only posted once. Hopefully, I can post on both days again starting Tuesday of next week. To read the one from this week posted on Tuesday visit here.

It’s one of those Thursdays —actually make that weeks! As the popular phrase goes, “the struggle is real.” That should be the theme of my life these days. The title of this series is titled, “The View Looks Fine From Here,” and the only view I have had this week has been from my bed. I read the verse from Psalm 128:24 which states,

“This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.”

However, we all have days where we do not “feel” like rejoicing, and that has been me this week. I have slept and felt woozy for the last few days because of a new medication.

Monday, I started taking s muscle relaxer for my spasticity from Cerebral Palsy. I’ve always had problems with that but it has been worse since I have been sick this past year. Spasticity makes my muscles extremely tight and painful, and lately I have not been able to relax or sleep well because of it. Thankfully, on Monday during my visit with Kim Gaither (Urology PA), she noticed how severe it was and is referring me to a new neurologist to help with that. However, in the meantime, she gave me a muscle relaxer that is supposed to work well with CP. And it is working but it is making me sleep a lot and I feel like a zombie…ha! Although today I realized that the medicine has helped, and for now the side effects are worth it. I had been praying for less pain and more sleep and God has answered those prayers so instead of complaining about the negative aspects, I was convicted that I need to be thankful. It has brought much pain relief for me and I’m truly grateful for that. Praise Jesus. Hopefully as I continue to take it the side effects will become less, but for now I’m glad for the ways it is helping.

Thanks again for all of your thoughts, prayers, and encouraging words. God uses them to fill my days with joy!

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