No matter how many trials I face, there is nothing He does not understand due to His death and resurrection. Instead of complaining about my current season, I realized that I am so undeserving of the Lord’s grace and love. He deserves all my praises not just when life is good but in the sufferings as well. It doesn’t matter how unfaithful we are, the Lord is always faithful to us. His love knows no end. Certain circumstances may make it difficult for us to view life from this perspective, but the Lord uses all things — joys as well as sorrows — for His glory.
As Philippians 1:21 states, “To live is Christ and to die is gain.” It should be my privilege to serve and rejoice in Christ on a daily basis despite the struggles I face. I may never know the reasons God allows me to suffer in this life but I will understand when I get to Heaven and that is all the explanation I need.
The Lord never stops working in our lives no matter how hard some days can be. Because of my chronic infections, I spend the majority of my days at home laying in my hospital bed. This allows me a lot of time to read, pray, and dwell on both the struggles and joys of life. On my sickest days I tend to worry and fret about what is to come and create many “what-if” scenarios in my mind (I think we have all been guilty of this at some point). Last week in my pondering I told God,
“Lord if I were healthy, I would be serving you in Africa or somewhere overseas. If I could, and if I were healthy just think of all the ministries I would be involved with?”
Then the Lord hit me hard with His response. After thinking and praying, I felt the Lord say,
“Amelia, you said you would be willing to go anywhere and do anything for me so how about living fully right where you are? This is where I want you and am using you for my glory. This is your ministry. I am using you more here than I would be using you in Africa because you are not meant for Africa — You are meant for here. This is your Africa. So child, be obedient to me and share what I am teaching you during this season.”
Wow, what a wakeup call from King Jesus. While overseas ministries are much needed, and working in a church Ministry full-time would be wonderful, God is showing me once again that I can be in ministry for Him even from a hospital bed. This is not what I had in mind by the time I was 32, but this is where God has me. Therefore, I desire to be obedient and make the best of the life He has given. As scripture points out, God often uses our weaknesses for His strength.
You may not be dealing with health issues but I know we all have our trials. I want you to be encouraged that God is using you even on the worst of days. He loves you more than you can imagine so continue to press into Him, and allow Him to work.
Throw out your expectations and desires. Instead, surrender to what the Lord has for you. Only then will you be content.
Let go of the pride or whatever is holding you back. It may not be easy but the Lord will carry you.
It is my desire to write more and share what God is teaching me in what I would call the most mundane of circumstances. However, beauty and joy can be found in the mundane so I look forward to sharing with you more of my journey in a series called “The View Looks Fine From Here.”
Also, thanks to all my prayer warriors who are praying for me daily. It means the world to me. I have an appointment with my infectious disease doctor tomorrow so I will post more details following that. I hope everyone has a great day!